Kamala Turaga

Born in Amalapuram, East Godavari district of Andhra Pradesh, mom moved to Hyderabad when she got married in 1971. And then to Bangalore in 2020. Yet, she identified with E. Godavari district (Tu-Go-Ji) and culture more than every other.

She was very proud that her father named her Kamala, and recollected he fondly called her Kamal. Her parents were living Gods for our mom. She often talked about how they lived a full and complete life. Most of her life she used them as a compass to check if she was on the right track and worked hard to live up to their expectations. May be that is why her cooking was one of the best - as often recognized by our grand-dad. And she never diluted any tradition - to the pleasure of our grand-mom, and our family matriarch.

She often referred to her childhood and natural talents as 'very ordinary'. Coming from a family of extraordinary people and high achievers, the bar was high. However, her life and accomplishments would prove to be 'extra-ordinary'. She would laughingly talk about her struggles to get through undergrad / degree college - and yet her own children / grand-children accomplished highest levels of academic excellence guided by her.

In Dad she found the perfect partner for 55 years. Both are inseparable in their values and activities. It's hard to write about mom separately. Both believed in wanting less and working hard. Never spoke ill of anyone. Never driven by comparisons or jealousy of other's possessions. Both felt eternally connected to their families, and siblings. Never measured their self-worth by what they owned. A small shared room in early years, to a 1 bed room home that was linear train like home in Vijayanagar colony, to a rented 1 bed room shared with growing two children + grandparents, to a small 2 bed room they bought in Red Hills and then to a swanky 2 bed room in HSR Bangalore - all were equally beautiful and sacred homes for them.

One of the greatest punyam by our mom was in the role of a daughter-in-law. She handled our grandparents - who lived with us in their last few years - with great love, devotion and patience. None of the space, time, financial and other constraints came in the way of her commitments to serving. Our grandmother introduced her proudly as her daugher in Machilipatnam. Our mother in turn, became a fabulous mother-in-law, who treated her daughter-in-law with love and care - that most mistook them to be a mother-daughter pair. So, it is apt to call her mother-in-love and daughter-in-love.

Shradha .... Sadbhavana ....

Home was everything for our mom. And nothing gave her more pleasure than cooking and feeding everyone. Ironically, in most homes she lived (till the last one in Bangalore) the kitchens were small and hot. Yet, she never complained about spending hours cooking there. And dished out hot, complex, and un-matched fresh food for everyone, every day and every time. She would cook real-time for unexpected guests in a rush, and yet produce delightful dishes. We often joked she should have been named Annapurna, and not Kamala.

Daily routine and rhythm of life were the bed rock of mom's life. Never missed pooja. Never missed a festival (and for her there were many more than we can name). Each festival with its rituals, poems, offerings and temple visits. Advent of cable TV and YouTube adding regular dose of TTD channel, Chaganti vari pravachanalu, and serials she watched -often getting easily confused about the plots / characters (thanks to Dad again, who sat next to her clarifying things).

Her family of siblings was closest to her heart. She would keep in close touch and look for every opportunity to meet them. There was little she spoke when she met them. Just loved being with them - listening to them and celebrating their lives. And if any of them fell sick or was suffering - she experienced the pain as her own. All her nieces and nephews were her children too.

She missed Hyderabad and all the social events. However, made the most out of her new life in Bangalore. Visting temples in HSR, walking around the complex meeting people and never missing the weekly Vishnu Saharanama parayanam on Saturdays with the local group. Always impeccably dressed. Conducting the parayanam occasionally in their home with great care, planning, enthusiasm and beauty.

Sundara ...

She loved her grandchildren, and controlled herself from being overindulgent. She believed in the old school tradition of never openly praising your children or over-indulging in them. With her children she could be firm and demanding. But she caved too easily with her grand kids.

She was an anxious personality. Would panic easily for little things. But, also had the ability to summon super human strength to persist and stand strong, if required for her family in a crisis. When Dad was admitted, she sat near the ER and in the hospital focused / fearless and negotiating with the doctors - an unrecognizable avatar of herself.

Navadurga ...

Words cannot describe what she was as a mom to us. She was always on. Intense. Focused. Worried. Committed. All in. She held a high bar for us. 100/100 in math was good, but she reminded us of an uncle who got 104. She believed great education, excellence at work, frugal living, adherence to traditions and devotion to God were key to good life - and one can never say, 'good enough'. Her children and her home were her proudest jewels. And she needed nothing else.

She hated hospitals. Constantly prayed for a quick and painless ending. Like all things she put her mind to, she achieved her goal in how her physical life ended.

We believe she is still with us, but in a different form. There are many more things she wanted us to do as a family - and we are sure her push and guiding hand will help us accomplish these to her expectations. God willing.

A life and legacy of Shradha, Sadhbhavana and Sundara continues ...