Mrs Brinda Jayaraman

Brinda was the eldest of 5 children born to R. Swaminathan and Saroja. She did most of her schooling in Thanjavur, staying with her Thatha and Ammakka Patti at their famous 24 Sivaji Nagar residence. She was greatly influenced by her younger Chithis--- Jayam, Sulochi, and Sachi. She completed her B.Sc in SIET, Chennai, where Jibu Mani was a year senior to her. She went on to obtain a B.Ed degree, after studying at Lady Willingdon College, Triplicane. She taught for a while in Thanjavur, before accompanying our parents to Jagdalpur in Bastar district. In this backward location, our father took the initiative to establish an English medium school. It was located inside the palace, with Brinda as the Principal. She had a narrow escape along with the children of the school when there was a clash between the police and the Adivasis who surrounded the palace, and held everyone inside the palace hostage.

She married Jayaraman (Jayanthu) in 1969. She had a trying time caring for him after he was diagnosed with cystic fibrosis. Despite his illness, they had more than 20 happy years together, during which time, they travelled widely, including visits to the US, Europe, Singapore and Hong Kong. Jayanthu passed away when Brinda was just 46. She moved in with our parents, who were tremendously supportive; counseling her on the way forward, and making sure that she would be independent. Determined to continue her studies, she obtained a Master’s degree in psychology, augmenting this by getting a PG diploma in counseling and specialized in parent-child issues, couple conflicts, teenage problems, addictions, and other issues such as depression and anxiety. She worked in the de-addiction ward in VHS without remuneration. She later did a course with Dr. Beck in the USA.

She had a meteoric rise in her profession as counselor in Chennai, helped and encouraged by Jibu. She appeared frequently on TV, providing counseling on the issues that I had mentioned earlier. Her Tamil diction was mellifluous, yet down-to-earth, enabling her to communicate very effectively with people of all classes. That won her a huge audience in India, and among Indians abroad.

She was deluged by invitations to schools and workplaces to conduct workshops for teachers, students, and employees. A co-founder of Chennai Counselors Foundation, she conducted many courses to train counselors. She was also a very active member of Agaram foundation, a non-profit organization, and helped many underprivileged children from rural areas to realize their dreams. And the list goes on.

Turning to personal relationships, although Brinda did not have any children, she was surrounded by people who loved and admired her whole-heartedly. Her only brother, Ambi, her 3 sisters, Vidya, Nithya, and myself , were all very close to her as were our spouses and our children and grand children. Similarly, Bhama Chithi and her children loved and enjoyed Brinda's company. I am not forgetting the cousins, aunts and only uncle-- Kittappa Mama and Kamala manni.

She and Jibu were not just sisters-in-law, but very close friends and confidants. She was also very close to Saashwathi and Raghu, both of whom respected and loved her..

Most importantly, she was the principal companion and care-giver to our mother for 20 years, after Appa passed away in the year 2000.

In 2015, with Ambi's and Nithya's encouragement, she and Amma moved from Chennai to Coimbatore. Nana Nani became home later that year. With her fame preceding her, and her innate virtues of sincerity and helpfulness, she became a very popular figure in Nana Nani. After Amma passed away in 2020, Ambi and Nithya provided close companionship and support to Brinda; Vidya and I visited regularly for family reunions. Her swansong was the arrangement of a cousin's reunion in Thanjavur, just 2 months ago; she and Nithya worked tirelessly to make this event a roaring success.

May her soul Rest in Peace!